Womanizer

There are few things that I should really be embarrassed about at this point in my life. We all know the story of me walking into a double parking meter, the story of my landing flat on my back after dismounting from the uneven parallel bars in the middle of a gymnastics meet, the story of me falling in love with a skydiver and my all time favorite, the story of me peeing in the dresser drawer. It's out in the open, we all laugh, I feel no shame.
I do however feel embarrased by my affection for top 40 music. I sometimes find myself amongst intellectuals and this part of me has to remain a carefully guarded secret. However you, my family, my friends can go ahead and laugh at me for it. You can poke fun of me as I find myself singing happily to the many ridiculous lyrics I hear on the radio particularly while driving and listening to the music at a volume that should have made me deaf ages ago. When I stop at a light I wonderif I should turn my music down for fear of looking like the closing in on 40 woman who's trying to look like I still fit in. Why am I sharing this you ask?
Well, as children are exposed to many things that are out of their parents control, there's a lot that they get from us. My children currently will sing unabashedly right along with me and one of Erin's favorite things to say while we are all in the car together is "Turn it up mom, I like it really loud". Part of me feels great about that because as we all know my children look nothing like me but if I can find something in them that resembles me, I get to add that to the genetic scorecard that I keep (I started this only because all I ever hear is how much the kids look like each other and just like Dan). The other part of me thinks that someone will call CPS because of what I'm exposing my children to.
So, long story even longer (I'm bored again at work), the ever lovely Brittney Spears has just released the single "Womanizer". Despite the fact that I don't really enjoy listening to her voice and I feel very sorry for her and all the trouble she's had in her life, she does come out with some pretty catchy tunes, so I listen and sing. So do the kids. While listening to the song the other day, Monkey asked me what a Womanizer was. My weak attempt at an explanation went something like this:
Monkey: Mom, What's a womanizer
Mom: Well, it's a man that likes to hug and kiss a lot of women.
Monkey: Is that wrong?
Mom: It is when at least one of those women expects that the man will only be hugging and kissing her.

That seemed to satisfy him until the next day when he posed this question to me:

Monkey: Mom, is a Womanizer like a job?
Mom: For some it is.

Let's hope he doesn't make a career of it.

BTW-The picture posted here is of a girl that has pursued him relentlessly. She told her mom this a.m. that they'd be getting married, but not for a long time because they still had a lot to do.

Lockdown

It was an exciting day in our city yesterday. While I was at work I received an email with the following message:

It is currently 11:30 a.m. The Pleasanton Police Department has requested that Alisal Elementary School go into lockdown mode due to police activity north of the school. It is believed that the incident is isolated to one home in the area. Gingerbread Preschool is also locked down, but PD did not feel it would be necessary for Amador Valley or Walnut Grove to do so.
More information will be sent as it becomes available.

That's not something you really want to read, especially because your kid is inside the school and you actually live north of the school. It all turned out fine, it's just the typical story of a heroine addict who's grandmother lives in your neighborhood robbing the branch of the bank located in the grocery store, fleeing on foot hoping to get a grilled cheese sandwich and soup and perhaps a cookie or two at grandma's house before heading off to get your next score. Unfortunately, grandma must have been out of white bread and American cheese so Mr. Hopped Up, became Mr. Hopping Backyard Fences until the K-9 unit got him.

An average day in P-town, where despite the economic crisis and falling home prices, the median home price remains over 800K. Admittedly, we do live in the "below the median" neighborhood so I guess it was bound to happen.

I volunteer in the classroom on Thursday afternoons so I was there right after the lockdown was no longer in force. Monkey described his feelings to me "It was scary but also really exciting. I was so scared I hugged Jack and my heart was pounding".

Walking

Anyone that has had to go anywhere with the CHF knows that she's very, how do I put this in a kind way....Princess like. She loves to be carried. This may be a chicken/egg debate but I'm not sure if she's just this way or we've created her love of being carried because she's small and often it was just faster to get to where we were going by carrying her. She's always preferred to be carried over being in a stroller or actually, GOD FORBID using her own legs to transport herself from one location to the next.

Around the CHF's 4th birthday, we did the unthinkable....we got rid of the strollers (mind you we did not do the unimaginable and get rid of the Ergo the most amazing child carrier on the face of the earth....www.ergobaby.com). One stroller had been in our possession since Monkey was 6 months old. The tires were free of any semblance of tread, the canvas was very weathered, the 2X4 piece of fabric formerly known as the arm strap hung sadly from the side of the handle and the straps to secure the child inside slowly disintegrated over time and the microscopic bits can be found somewhere between our house and Main Street (no that's not Main Street that the Presidential candidates are so fond of referring to when trying to connect with the middle class, it's literal, I live in a town with a Main Street). The other stroller was a purchase that I'd made when the CHF was still in an infant car seat and it allowed me to remove the infant seat from the car and snap it into the stroller without disturbing her highness. We never really liked that stroller but every now and then the princess would request transportation in said vehicle (I think just for the sheer pleasure of watching us struggle to get it on and off sidewalks). Although not as old, it too was weathered and not worthy of passing on to another family, we dumped them both.

I discussed with the CHF that she was now 4 which qualified her as a big girl (despite still being <30lbs). I went further to tell her that 4 year olds are big enough to walk to school and that I would no longer carry her to school, hers or her brother's, in the a.m. We were very optimistic that first morning as we set out to walk Monkey to school. The optimism was gone by the time we got 5 postage stamp sized houses from ours, that's when the whining began. Now, admittedly it could be because the 5th house from ours belongs to MZ, the best cook/baker on the street and perhaps in our city. Usually walking by her house elicits a Pavlovian response in both children and they are both suddenly hungry so whining occassionally happens in that location anyway. An arguement between the CHF and I ensued and it went something like this:

Me: "CHF dear you have to walk to school, it's not far and you're a big girl now"
CHF: "I'm tired, my legs hurt, my legs are chilly, I'm tripping because my legs are tired, I'm going to fall...." (at that point I tuned out)
Me: "Get up now or you will be left behind"
CHF: "ok, I'll wait right here for you"
Me (to myself): "SH*t, she'll will too"

As it turns out, I'm far more interested in getting Monkey to school on time than proving a point to the CHF. She won, I carried her. Over the past month, I've been working on getting her to walk to Monkey's school and then to her own school. I've had to listen to the whining and complaining on most days but I've been fairly successful in getting her to walk most of the way. Today I had the luxury of going in to work early, dear hubby took the kids to school.

I got a call 6 minutes after Monkey started school. I picked up the phone to hear dear hubby laughing a full belly laugh. After he was able to catch his breath for a moment or two, he shared the following with me...

After carrying the CHF to Monkey's school on his shoulders (he does this all the time for her, she just has to use her really cute voice and she's hoisted up like the princess she is). He indicated to her that it was time for her to walk and put her down. Of course she clung to him like a booger does to a child's finger right before they eat it. He tried to pry her off of him but said that it was as though rigor mortis had set in. He looked down at her and said something to the effect of "Your not going to walk are you", she looked at him with her big brown eyes and crazy curly hair and said with a perfected warble in her voice "i'm not really in a walkin' mood today, daddy!"

Rhythmic Gymnastics

I'm wondering if she's a candidate for the above mentioned "sport". I'm not a fan of the "sport" myself but I think the CHF adds a new flair by choosing Pink's new song titled "So What" as her background music. I think it speaks volumes for who she believes she is. Enjoy the show.